From Gossip to Encouragement: Building Trust in Healthcare Teams
“Did you see Sarah at the end of shift again? She never helps.”
If you work in healthcare, you have probably heard something like this in the hallway, the break room, or the parking lot. Maybe you’ve said it yourself on a hard day. Most of us have.
Gossip is one of those workplace habits everyone says they either justify as “our culture” or feel bad about yet it keeps going. In my work with healthcare facilities, I’ve come to see that gossip isn’t a sign of bad people. It is a sign of unmet needs. And once we understand those needs, we can start replacing gossip with something that connects people more strongly, replacing gossip harm with team trust.
Why Gossip Spreads in Healthcare Settings
Care work is emotionally heavy. Workloads are high, patients and families can be demanding and unappreciative, and staff regularly face sadness, loss, and moral distress. All of that emotion has to go somewhere. Without a safe place to put it, it often comes out sideways, as talk about other people.
Gossip also grows when information is slow or unclear. When staff don’t know why a decision was made or what change is coming, they fill in the blanks together. Speculation quickly turns into “news.”
And healthcare teams are deeply relational. Many are mostly women, and conversation is a big part of how people bond and feel included. When there are no structured spaces for sharing, that bonding tends to form around complaints or stories about someone who isn’t in the room.
The Needs Under the Gossip
When I work with teams, I invite them to look at what I call the needs under the gossip:
- A need to vent. People need to offload frustration and distress, and gossip is a quick, informal way to do it.
- A need for information. When communication has gaps, people speculate together to make sense of what’s happening.
- A need to belong. Being “in the know” feels like being included.
- A lack of positive norms. If no one has said what respectful communication looks like, and leaders don’t redirect negative talk, gossip starts to feel normal.
- Missing skills for direct conversation. When people don’t feel safe or able to address an issue directly, they talk about people instead of to them.
None of these needs are wrong. The problem is the way they are being met.
Redirect, Don’t Repress
Trying to ban gossip doesn’t work. People will just get quieter about it. The goal is not “never talk about people.” It’s “talk about people in ways that help rather than harm.”
Here’s what that looks like in practice:
- Normalize encouraging and appreciative comments. Share good news, strengths, and wins about each other. It’s just as connecting as complaining, and it builds trust instead of eroding it.
- Create shared agreements. Co-create a few simple team norms, such as “We don’t talk about someone who isn’t in the room, unless it’s to appreciate them or to find a solution.”
- Model small positive behaviours. Leaders and peer influencers set the tone. Saying thank you, naming someone’s strengths, and gently redirecting a conversation when gossip starts all make a difference.
- Give stress a safe outlet. Short debrief huddles, access to support, and set times to talk through difficult cases keep emotional pressure from leaking out as gossip.
What to Say When Gossip Starts
This is where most people get stuck. You don’t want to join in, but you also don’t want to lecture a coworker who is clearly having a hard day.
Try a two-step response:
- Name the need. “It sounds like you’re exhausted and feeling unsupported.”
- Offer a helpful next step or ask a curious question. “What do you think could help solve this problem?” or “What if we planned how to ask her for help next shift?”
Here’s how that might sound in a few common situations.
“Management doesn’t care about us.” “I can hear how discouraged you feel. What is one thing our team is doing well despite the pressure? From there maybe we could come up with one specific concern to bring forward together.”
“Night shift is so lazy.” “I hear you. It feels like we’re starting behind every day. Let’s assume they’re also under pressure. If we bring this to the group as a shift change system issue, nobody gets blamed and we might come up with something we haven’t thought of.”
“She’s the manager’s favourite.” “It feels unfair, doesn’t it? We could be assuming, though. How could we calmly ask if there can be more input on scheduling?”
Notice what these responses do. They don’t shame the speaker. They acknowledge the feeling, question the assumption, and turn the energy toward a solution. That’s how a gossip moment becomes an encouragement moment.
What If People Talked About You Like This?
One of my favourite exercises with care teams is what I call the Back-of-the-Shirt Encouragement Walk. Everyone has a sheet of paper taped to their back, and colleagues quietly move around the room writing specific, genuine encouragements: “You stay calm with families.” “You’re the first to help when it’s busy.” “You make patients smile.”
When people take the papers off and read them, the room changes. Many staff carry a quiet fear that people are saying bad things about them behind their backs. This exercise gives them proof of the opposite: people notice them and value them.
Then I ask: “What would it be like if the talk behind our backs sounded like this more often?”
Why This Matters for Patients
When trust improves and gossip goes down, communication and teamwork get better. People share information more openly, ask for help sooner, and solve problems together. That directly affects the patients and their families and affects morale on the floor.
Start With Your Team
Here’s a simple place to begin. At your next team meeting, talk about gossip misconceptions, and the real needs underneath it. Acknowledge that it is a popular way of coping and connecting. Then co-write three to five “To build trust on our team we will…” statements together, such as:
- “We will talk to people, not about them.”
- “We will share at least one appreciation about the team or individuals on our team at the beginning of our meetings.”
Ask for a volunteer on each shift to champion the agreement.
If you’d like support bringing this to your team, I offer a hands-on From Gossip to Encouragement workshop for healthcare facilities, where staff practise these skills together and leave with their own team agreement. marie@shiftworkplace.com
Gossip has been a corrosive glue dissolving workplace trust for a long time. Encouragement can hold a team together with only positive side effects!
FAQs (frequently asked questions) about workplace gossip
Why does gossip happen in the workplace?
Workplace gossip often develops when employees have unmet emotional or social needs. They may need to vent frustration, seek information, feel included, or address problems they don’t feel comfortable discussing directly. When communication is unclear and employees lack safe opportunities to express concerns, gossip can become an informal way of coping and connecting.
How does workplace gossip affect team trust and collaboration?
Gossip can create suspicion, damage relationships, and make employees feel uncomfortable or unsafe around their colleagues. It can also discourage people from sharing information, asking for help, and working together. Over time, this weakens trust and makes it harder for teams to solve problems effectively.
How can leaders stop gossip without creating more conflict?
Rather than simply banning gossip or reprimanding employees, leaders should understand what is driving the behavior. Acknowledge the person’s frustration, ask questions to uncover the underlying concern, and redirect the conversation toward a constructive solution. Leaders should also model respectful communication and establish clear expectations for how team members speak about one another.
What is the difference between workplace gossip and constructive conversation?
Workplace gossip typically involves discussing someone who is not present in a way that spreads assumptions, complaints, or negative judgments without helping resolve the issue. Constructive conversation focuses on understanding a situation, addressing concerns respectfully, and finding solutions. The goal is not to avoid discussing people altogether, but to make conversations helpful rather than harmful.
How can employees respond when coworkers start gossiping?
Employees can avoid joining negative conversations without embarrassing or confronting the speaker harshly. Start by acknowledging the person’s feelings, then ask a question that redirects attention toward a possible solution. For example, instead of agreeing that a coworker is difficult, ask, “What do you think we could do to improve the situation?” This helps shift the conversation from blame to problem-solving.
How can organizations build a culture of encouragement?
Organizations can make encouragement a regular part of workplace communication by recognizing employees’ strengths, expressing appreciation, celebrating contributions, and creating opportunities for colleagues to support one another. Leaders can also establish shared team agreements, such as speaking directly to people about concerns and sharing positive observations about colleagues.
What is the role of courtesy and civility in preventing workplace gossip?
Courtesy and civility encourage employees to treat one another with consideration, respect, and kindness, even during stressful situations. When these behaviors become workplace expectations, employees are more likely to address disagreements directly, listen to different perspectives, and avoid conversations that damage relationships.
How can leaders create an emotionally safe workplace where employees feel comfortable speaking up?
Leaders can build emotional safety by listening without immediately judging, communicating decisions clearly, welcoming questions, and providing appropriate opportunities for employees to discuss frustrations. Regular team check-ins and short debriefing sessions can also give employees a constructive outlet for difficult experiences before those feelings turn into gossip or resentment.
What is the S.W.E.L. approach to building a healthier workplace culture?
S.W.E.L. stands for Safety, Wellbeing, Encouragement, and Learning. It is an approach to creating workplaces where employees feel respected, supported, motivated, and able to grow. By incorporating these four elements into everyday interactions, leaders can encourage healthier communication, stronger relationships, and a more positive workplace environment.
How can workplace encouragement improve patient care in healthcare teams?
In healthcare settings, encouragement can strengthen trust and communication among staff members. When employees feel appreciated and supported, they are more likely to share important information, ask for assistance, and work together to address problems. Better teamwork and communication can contribute to more coordinated care and a better experience for patients and their families.
About the Author
Marie Gervais, PhD, CEO, Shift Management Inc. specializes training managers to lead, and coaching for emotionally regulated performance. She has a background in integrating and managing the diverse workforce and in creating culturally responsive curriculum courses and programs for industry. Marie’s book, “The Spirit of Work: Timeless Wisdom, Current Realities” to understand the deeper processes behind workplace issues and find inroads into creating healthy and vibrant organizations is available on Amazon and other online book stores.